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Major Site Updates and FAQ
On this page, I am going to link to major site updates and provide links to some things that you may need as you enjoy the internet. Below the links, I added a link to an explanation just incase you want to know how stuff works. For example, There is now a link to the story uploader on every erotic story category page and one here at the top - on the right side. Below it is a blue link that will take you to the explanation of how it works if you are interested...
If you have a question that you want answered, just type it into the comments section of the Questionnaire and maybe the answer will appear here...
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Useful Links
EroticTymes Story Uploader
Flash Player Update Page
Spybot - Search & Destroy
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Sorry, I had to blow off most of the uniform porn... it will be back soon!
Two new submitted stories can be found Here
The top one is by KinkyBrian and it has a link to his site so you can read more stories by him.
PunkMaister sent in a story based on the 2007 - Transformers Movie.
And the rest of the stories on that page have been there for only a short time as well. Now, there were two people that submitted stories that somehow got lost in the net somewhere. As a back up method, you can email me - eroticty at erotictymes.com if you have questions about story submission or anything else.
The Milf galleries were drastically improved! I know - I know, I thought that pop up script was kinda cool but it like other things needed a complete rebuild. There are new galleries from Big Tits in Sports. Now before you dismiss the idea ... Consider, they all have a massive set of cans but that is not the point... They are all Milfs and some of the scenarios are sorta good. They are not real cliff hangers or anything but still ... I was amused by the strip ping pong and the hunter one where she goes out hunting and shoots the guy cause well, she has a gun and he has a cock and this is porn. lol:) Madelyn Marie goes horse back riding. Yikes!! That woman is just hot! Her riding a horse naked ... Ding Ding ding! We have a winner!!!
Now, if you were a woman and you were reading this, you might want a couple extra details and here they are .... There are around 3000 scenes / scenarios included in the Brazzers Pass and a few of them are a bit lame cause ultimately, they are just to get the couples fucking. The other small warning is that in some of the scenes, the sex can get a bit rough. In pornstar punishment, the pornstars get punished. Clothes ripped off - tossed to the floor. Sometimes, a bit of hair pulling and choking. If that is not your bag, the good news is that the pass includes 28 sites so there are plenty to choose from.
The bikini galleries were drastically improved and the rape fantasy galleries - page 2 is back. They got hacked so both those sites were missing for months. It looks like most of the galleries are back with only a few minor pieces missing so enjoy if ya will...
Enjoy some Nude Women on the Beach :) Let me draw this for you ... I got a email from Michelle ( the one with red paint on her cooch) telling me a bit about her site. Now as you know, Halloween is past so that means winter is on it's way. Soz, I clicked the link from Michelle to have a look at her and her site. Now, we all know that in the winter, there is nothing better than a hot women in micro bikini. Well, there is one thing better than a hot women in a micro bikini. That would be Michelle! This dirty blonde - blue eyed woman just smokes! She sizzles in a micro bikini and she is only too happy to remove it right there on the beach! Naturally, I asked Michelle for a pass to her site and I was sooo busy checking her out that I am a bit behind on the updates here because I soon found out that the only thing better than watching Michelle on the beach is the movies of Michelle having sex with her girl friends!! I will show ya some of that too cause it would just be wrong to keep it all too myself. lol:)
More Halloween galleries in the Seasonal and Holiday Porn section :)
We just added a bunch more illustrated stories including the new category Illustrated slut wife sharing stories These stories all link to new galleries so there is a lot more to enjoy...
Wed. Oct 27, 2010 - EroticTymes was moved to a way larger server. There will probably be a few unexplained errors over the next few days while we wait for the propagation to complete. In simple terms, remember the last time you changed living locations - the mail (you) is suposta be delivered to the new house but some of you are still going to be delivered to the old house. It is just a matter of waiting for the post office to sort out the address change.
Go pink on Facebook to show your support for breast cancer detection. Turn your profile picture pink and Telus will donate $1 to the purchase of innovative breast cancer technology. Type "telus" ( no quotes ) into the facebook search.
We added Babes in Nylons and Only Tease will eventually appear on the uniforms page to make the whole adventure complete. That way, you can choose between hot women in fantastic outfits that tease and teasing women that don't stop the show until there is a wet spot. :)
We are even looking for a place where you can purchase the same fantastic outfits.
In other news, The stats indicate that EroticTymes is due for another server upgrade. Once again, the upgrade should be painless. I just have no idea when it will happen - yet...
See way more elf Galleries here - Seasonal and Holiday Porn
The Mobile Porn page now has a link to this site. Google frowns on linking to results in the serps so I wrote it as a /gwt/ search for EroticTymes which should give you a google transcoder version complete with an explanation of how to get to the major categories. If it does not work, let me know...
The Illustrated Sex Stories - Are now moved to their new location. There is a link - Illustrated Sex Stories New categories will arrive as fast as possible. The even better news is that the new version of each story is now pop up - free so you can save the pictures easily! As you guessed, we mostly do pictures because people love them! Movies are good but if you want to see the bead of sweat on her forehead or the tears in her eyes as the whip chews up her fine ass, then you need the hi-res pics - preferentially from a Nikon DX-series camera! I think This picture proves my point. Here is a link in case you want to see the rest of Teen Katya squirts!
This is a small time saver / frustration reducer for you... If you click this...
Star Trek - The Voyages of the Star Ship Intercourse, Star Trek opens in a new window (or tab). Before you read the story, mouse over the top 3 pictures to notice the picture numbers. That is right - 003,006,012. We don't have the missing pictures but Naked-Movie does! We do however, have the movie clips and they are at the bottom of the story. Enjoy if you will <vbg>
If you look at...
The Fucking Of The Elf, you will see that the links to all 6 movies are now on the bottom of the page. This way, one could see all 6 movies without joining one of those nasty porn sites <grin> But Wait!!! There is more! Hot Movies has just about every movie on the planet as either - pay per minute at 8 cents per minute or you can buy the whole movie without DRM for cheap!
Some companies use DRM (Digital rights management). - Basically, you downloaded a movie from somewhere, every time you watch the movie, it forces the movie player to check if you are still a member there. Thus, the movie does not play if you are no longer a member at the place where you got it.
If you are new to the game, you may want to consider flash movies. Flash movie players load faster, are easy to use, instantly fast forward without delay and the Sothink - free flash video (FLV) Player even checks for updated versions.
For amusement, We added 27 new Upskirts Galleries.
All the off-site links on the home page now open in new windows!
A clip from a story...
Scanning the area again as they climbed the steps to the door, he cursed softly when his arm - bound by the sling would not move. With a grin, he pulled the door open with his left hand. "Don't say a word..." He growled at the two grinning women.
Leading the way down a short hallway that was lined on both sides with coat racks, he yanked another door open then followed his companions into a large bustling dining room.
As if psychic, the hostess spotted them almost immediately. Issuing instructions to a nearby waitress, she raced through the crowd towards them. Making a quick zig zag around his companions, she leapt into the air. With a thump that caused a lot of patrons to pause their meals for a look, he landed against the wall with the hostess wrapped around him. Sliding his good arm down along her short black skirt, he tucked it under her ass as he lifted her slightly to take some of her weight off her thighs. Just as quickly, he tilted his head back just a fraction so that their noses did not collide when she kissed him hard on the lips. Leaning back - her breasts no longer resting on the arm that was bound across his chest, she grinned - pleased to be hanging there.
"Morning Boss!" She said.
"Morning Tiffi" He allowed his eyes to drift down from her face for a look at the goods presented by the strapless bra inside her low cut white top. "I so enjoy these moments..." As soon as their eyes met again, she pulled herself up for a lingering kiss. Her lips rubbing across his cheek to his left ear, she whispered..."I hope your friends enjoyed the show." With a giggle, she pushed away - landing on her feet as graceful as a cat.
You can upload your erotic story in the .doc, .rtf, or .txt formats. Now, if you are wondering why We / I did not include word or wordperfect formats, the answer is simple. There is always a new version of both programs and the only real difference between the new one and the old one is the hastle of trying to open a newer format document with an older version of the program. That is why there is a box at the bottom that you can "paste" your story into.
After you enter the key (which really reduces the number of spam emails that we get from spiders), the submit button pastes the contents of the box into or attaches the file to a email then sends it to us. There is no server access for the simple fact that as soon as you open a 'share' folder or anything of that nature, there is always a piece of flotsam that feels the need to hack your server or try to upload a virus. Suddenly, you see the value of html - no viruses...
Adobe offers you a Google toolbar. Remember, you don't have to take it if you don't want it. Just click the check mark so it is not there anymore.
Let's say, that you decided to down load "spybot". When the download window pops up, you are given the options of "save" and "run". You don't have to save - blablabla.exe to your computer... Just click the run button. That way, you don't have to delete it later when there is a new version. After you click "run", look for an "advanced" button or option.
Here are the secrets ... The "advanced" section is where you get the extra options and you don't have to be a computer guru to use them!. For example - You really don't need to install the Chinese character set if you can't read Chinese. And!!! If you don't want the toolbar then remove the check mark. Fuck them! It is your computer!!
This program is fantastic! It scans your computer for over 12.5 million types of spybots and it cleans up your temporary files. Here is a link to the tutorial page...
Spybot Tutorial page
Steps 1 and 2 on the tutorial page, have you save the program - somewhere, then find it on your computer to run it. Click "run" and save yourself some headaches. When Spybot opens, click "Search for Updates". After you have the updates, click "Check for problems" You can read steps 5 and 6 if ya want, I skipped to step 7.
Here is the part you want to know... The "Check for problems" should pop up a box that tells you that you have temporary files. The last time, I had 502 of them. Do you want to get rid of them? Damn straight, Skippy! They are the crap that makes your computer - start up slower. Also, Step 8 - You don't want to "Immunize"! Yeah, it says it will prevent tracking cookies from entering your system... Little hint - Resident programs slow your computer down and those cookies that it prevents, would be the same cookies that it will delete - next month, if you remember to run it... <Very Big Grin>
I use this to clean up temporary internet files in both IE and Firefox. Personally, I unchecked cookies and history. A good rule of thumb, you might want to remove the check if you don't know what the option does. I was going to explain a bunch of the major options and I may still get to it but for now, the default settings should not hurt any...
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